Saturday, 18 February 2017

Quicksand.

It is an emotion, being in quicksand. Slowly and surely, you feel being pulled into it.

Scientifically, quicksand is sand that has absorbed too much water and becomes extremely light. You step on it and it gives way. You will not drown to death; you will only feel like you will. Because the ground below is not infinite and it has a base. If you just remain calm and slowly find your way out of it, you will live.

I guess it is not easy to be calm at that time. Maybe the brain stops working and the logic does not seem logical. Only the ones who have felt it can explain though it is inexplicable. This feeling of drowning into nothingness.


Quicksand is not always a negative state to be in, contrary to what Google says when you search for it. So this might be a different take on the concept. This is the fun about abstract topics; there are always more perspectives than what meets the eye.

You might be drunk on ambition and greed; it pulls you in. it is difficult to stop the craziness, and it is quicksand. It requires the strength and will power to come out of this mad cycle.

You might be in love. You might be losing something or someone. You are experiencing it and not able to take the path which is logical and practical for you. The constant war, the constant debate in your head. Sometimes the pull and the tide are way too strong: quicksand.

I think courage is the key here. Courage does not always mean being not afraid. Or to find the way, to swim to the shore, to fight for what you want. Sometimes courage is also to find the will to stay right at the spot you are, just holding on. You don’t have to wait for help, you just have to hold on. It does not mean you are depending on anything or anyone else to come and find you. It is just enough to just hold on. It is okay.



Quicksand is not a bad place to be. If you happen to be in one, give it a chance. Give yourself the chance to experience it. It might change the whole perspective of life that you had.

Saturday, 21 January 2017

The pain of Optimism


Be positive.

Hold on. If you truly want it, nothing is impossible.


Believe in it and it will happen.


Law of attraction works.


When you want something, the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

Great thinkers, philosophers and speakers have always focused upon the power of positivity and optimism. Their writings and quotes have inspired millions to get back on their feet and achieve quite difficult dreams and goals. Self help books sales are getting higher each year. Today's world is tough to live in with tougher challenges and tougher aspirations. In such times, staying optimistic is the mantra and is contagious. The more optimistic people are, the better.

I am a firm believer in positivity and am of the notion that everything can be possible if only we can strive towards it. Be it a new challenging work profile or catching an office cab in 4 minutes flat, it can be done if only I try and give it my best. Optimism is like an omnipresent initial feeling about almost everything.

Lately I have been wondering, like everything else , does optimism also has two faces to it in terms of consequences?

You are positive about a dream that you have. A dream that seems impossible to be true. You work towards it and give it your one hundred percent to make it happen. You pray, send out that message to the universe (request it to conspire) and you tirelessly believe in it. But it is a known fact and you know it, it is not going to happen. NO matter how hard you try or how badly you want it, it is just not going to be a reality. 

This is the arrival point of the pain of optimism, and it arrives in full pomp and style.

Being positive pushes you to keep believing in your dream, logic and experience pushes you to give it up. It is a fight between the right and left side of the brain, it is a war between the heart and the mind. But damn, it must be frustrating.

If your core is optimistic and you have never-give-up attitude, you are in for a disaster in such situations. You will be torn. What do you do then? Give up your core and accept defeat in the face of the ruthless realities of life. Or foolishly keep working and hoping and praying that one day, your dream will come true. 

How does one deal with such situations or does one have to deal at all or let life take its course? Let time tell. Just let it be until that precious dream stumble upon realization that it is supposed to remain and disappear in the same form. Allow it to self-subtract and self-destruct.

Poof!









Thursday, 23 June 2016

Eventually everything connects

“In chaos theory, the butterfly effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions on which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large difference in a later state”. (Work of Edward Lorenz).

A butterfly flapping its wings in India can cause a hurricane to happen at a later time somewhere in Argentina. If the butterfly had not flapped its wings at a certain point in space/time, the hurricane probably would not have happened at all. This shows the interdependence of different elements in this universe and the connection is real and proved. Everything is connected from the breath of a new born baby to someone falling in love far away. Each person that we meet in the different walks of our life are a part of the plan, each activity of ours leads the story on and connects to make a part of a story of someone else’s life.

Let’s imagine, you missed your usual time route C metro train and had to wait for another 2 minutes for the next one. The train which you missed earlier had a seat which you would have occupied if you had reached on time. This seat which is now vacant was taken by a girl, H, who is not having a very good day and is relieved to find a seat. H had a tough day because she was fired from her temporary position in a company because the permanent employee, A, is back from her maternity leave. H knew she was a temp but was performing well and needed this job badly. A had to fight with her husband, O, and in laws to re-join as they wanted her to be a stay-at-home mom to look after the kid. A has worked hard in her job and her career is a part of who she is. O only wanted A to be at home for some time as he thought it would be good for the baby and had no intention of ruining her career. O himself is having a hard time at office due to lay-offs by his company and his boss, S, might give him the pink slip any time. And guess what? S is you. It is all a part of the big picture.




Who, how and why you meet is pre designed. The three states as a result of the choices that you make (yes/no/neutral) is also pre designed. They say time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life and your behavior decides who stays in your life. The person sitting next to you in a cab can turn out to be your soul mate. Your batch mate in a class of 50 can be the boss for your kid brother. Your best friend of one time can be lost and disappear from your life in a frame of 5 years. God does not play dice and everything is destined to happen, of course depending on what you choose.


“Destiny is the result of the choices that you make in life” And the choice that you have made in the past or are going to make tomorrow is connected to many destinies, yours and others. Nothing happens without a reason and every move you make is moving from one dot to another. Life is a path connecting dots in the canvas, and if we can just peep into it to see the bigger picture, we will realise that eventually everything connects. 



That’s how life happens.







Monday, 20 June 2016

Breakfast Extravaganza

A friend of mine once quoted "Lunch and dinner is overrated. Breakfast is definitely the most important meal of the day". A good breakfast advice is rooted in serious scientific studies too.

Having a grand breakfast means getting up early in the morning, you surely cannot have it post 12 o'clock. It will be called a brunch then or rather, early lunch. So being a late riser, I definitely missed out on those "breakfast in style" for a long time. But better late than never!

There are plenty of places where one can enjoy a beautiful breakfast, relax and have a good time. Thanks to ever increasing fad of "themed restaurants", Bangalore boasts of a huge list of such places. Outdoor sittings, artistically themed, European decor, open terrace sittings,cosy places, book cafes etc are just a few to name.

I have recently been to a few. Did not take many, but think images below can somehow provide a glimpse of what I relished!

Cafe Max: Located in Indiranagar, it has open spaces and it is airy with sunlight coming in through the open windows. They have  pastry counter and the sitting is casual. Good food and nice ambiance. I had apple pie and farmer's breakfast with coffee. Yum!!

Ant's cafe: I had a pleasant surprise after reaching this place that Ant stands for Action Northeast Trust and is a part of  voluntary organisation that works on the development issues in Northeast India. Greeted by a map of NE India with all the ethnic tribes mentioned on it, you enter into a store showcasing and selling all the traditional stuff of Northeast. The cafe is in the first floor, the steps leading to it has interesting facts about ants. Beautiful setting with greenery all around, there are no windows and I would love to sit there when it rains. They keep books for reading and they serve breakfast the whole day. English breakfast or Belgian breakfast with pancakes are a must try!


154 Breakfast Club: A small cosy place in  residential area in Koramangala. They have an open kitchen and homely sitting. Services are prompt though weekends are busy. Had the "Big Breakfast". Good food and awesome omelettes!


Smoke House Deli: Quite the posh place it is. European styles, clean, pristine ambience with amazing music. Mostly European crowd, they have an outdoor sitting too. White color seemed to be the theme of the place. They say that all their dishes are gluten and trans fat free, so be ready for a guilt free trip to good food. Awesome service.


MTR: Madras Tiffin Room, the one in Indiranagar is almost always crowded and they have space outside to wait in line. You can buy coffee/tea while waiting! Masala dosas are the best here. Filter coffee is a must-try.


It is not only about the food, it is about the whole experience. Fresh air and energetic people around makes this time of the day really good. What more do you need to do on an weekend, it is all about relaxing right. So call up friends to plan a grand breakfast or grab a book one fine Saturday morning and off you go! Happy Weekend Breakfasting ..


Courtesy: Zomato
My guide to restaurants!




Tuesday, 17 May 2016

Being alone and being lonely

Do you not mind going to the movies alone? Do you not mind mall hopping alone? Do you not mind having a coffee and reading a book at a cafe alone? Do you not mind travelling alone? Do you not mind going to the beach and sit alone? Do you not mind sitting and eating alone?

If your answer to all or any of these is no, then I belong to your club. Our species might be rare but definitely not absent. Us doing these does not mean that we are dejected by friends, family or lovers or we are freaks. My colleagues calls me a 'weirdo' because I sometimes go to movies alone or go for shopping alone. I don't mind being called that because I know I am just as normal as them.

Probably we are very comfortable in our own company, listening to the thoughts that crawls through our minds. Or we just want to go out and we do, as simple as that!

I have my breakfast alone at office and I like it. Not a morning person and can't handle gossip at 8 o'clock. But I do have coffee and lunch with my friends at office.

I have been staying alone for the past 5 years. And the questions comes from every possible direction that what the hell I do alone? What do I eat? With whom do I talk to? What do I do at weekends? Don't I get bored? Do I have friends at all? The curiosity of humans at other people's  expense is incredible!

Yes, I stay alone. I have hobbies and interests. I cook my food and eat. I watch romcom and love it. I listen to music and probably sway to some favorite numbers. I have my folks back home and I have people in my life who loves me enough to let me have my space. They don't suffocate me with probing questions and they don't investigate my case. They care enough to just let me be. I have few but special friends. We may not share a minute to minute report but we do share our happiness and troubles. My life is good.

I might look alone but definitely am not lonely. There is a huge difference, my friend.

Tuesday, 10 May 2016

Immeasurable love

We all love and we are all loved. It is a basic emotion and is the most sought after. It is an extremely fulfilling feeling and is the root of many heart wrenching stories. People rise in love and achieve greatness in life. People lose in love and succumb to many levels of deaths in one lifetime. So love is all there is and they say "love is not for the faint hearted".

But can we measure love..if yes, what are the dimensions to measure it in? What is just the right amount of love for it to be sustainable? What duration must love live to prove its genuinity? Can't we love deeply but briefly, passionately but selfishly? All the terms, conditions and boundaries that makes us self-appointed judges of love distracts us from the truth that love is boundless, timeless and has a mind of its own. It is not a slave to our philosophies and man-developed theories. Love has wings and it flies. It is pure and heart-driven, innocent and tumultuous.


A mother's love is the purest of all and there is certainly no doubt about it. A mother can love all her children equally and infinitely. But is romantic love divisible i.e can you love more than two people at the same time? If you do, does it mean that you really love neither of them or you love both of them? Is this possible and does this kind of love exists?

Long gone are the days when people had to wait for months to get a reply to their love letters. Probably it will be carried by a bird or a man by foot across great distances. What remarkable patience they might have had! Now we are into instant messaging and instant calls.

"The double ticks has become blue, why has not she replied yet?She probably does not care for me."

"I called him like 2 times, why has not he called back yet? He probably does not think of me at all."

"He did not plan to come and meet me, he wanted to stay in. Why? he does not have any interest in me anymore."

How do you know and how do you measure the love? The time it took for her to reply after reading your messages or the number of times he sent her flowers. If a person has loved before, does this fact make him/her less capable of loving again?How much time gap is appropriate? Simple yet quite complicated.


How can we measure something which is itself not measurable, it has no units. Maybe love is vast like the universe and deep like the sea, not limited by days, months or years. In this mundane world, are not we lucky to still find love no matter how brief or deep, how shallow or selfish, how pure or exclusive.  Can we just hold on to it and not spend our limited and precious time in defining and measuring it?











Wednesday, 9 December 2015

Dear heart

Dear Heart.

It's you and me.
Against this world.

Stay close.